What Really Matters When it Comes to Self-Care

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What Really Matters When it Comes to Self-Care

What is Self Care?

Mainstream media, social networks and influencers will keep you believing self-care is anything related to hair, nails, makeup, or skin care…

Try the newest sheet mask with goat milk and period blood – totally kidding!

Long nails with crazy adornments are all the rage (still trying to figure out how they do basic things like buttons, contacts or typing)

The newest color palettes for every facial feature and then the matching skin care line to go with it

By the time you’ve decided on what you want and seen the price tag to go with it will leave you questioning whether or not this is really worth it.

I know 2 things:

  1. Being a woman is expensive
  2. Our basic grooming needs are not a complete self-care solution

So what in the hell is a complete self-care solution and how do you do it?

This not a straight answer and 100% based on the needs of the person who is doing the self-care.

If you were to look up the self-care definition, based on Oxford Languages:

Self Care Definition

Or you could go based off what The World Health Organization says:

WHO defines self-care as “the ability of individuals, families and communities to promote health, prevent disease, maintain health, and to cope with illness and disability with or without the support of a healthcare provider”.

Maybe you spend most of your time on Instagram and/or Tiktok and what you see there might be the latest beauty products, newest diet/exercise plan and maybe some tips to help you protect your own well-being. So you see, the information is all subjective based on where it is coming from and who is taking it in.

Which just makes it more confusing, overwhelming and too difficult to try and figure out.

For as long as I can remember, I believed that as long as I had a difficult skin care routine that I did morning and night, I took bubble baths and put on face masks that I had the ultimate self-care practice. I would buy all the things and then they would sit underneath my sink collecting dust until they would get used once in a full blue moon or thrown in the trash because you are not sure what science experiment it turned into.

I don’t even want to think about all the money I’ve wasted on products I never used and honestly never made me feel better about myself only worse because of the guilt for wasting the product and the money. Which defeats the whole purpose of practice self-care.

It was not until after I started my journey to better myself that I began to get a clearer picture of what self-care really is to me and how I can go about incorporating it into my daily life.

Self Care Categories

After doing some googling and finding what was true for me, what made the most sense was breaking down self-care into nine different categories:

Physical self care – Involves movement of the body, health, nutrition, sleep, rest, physical touch and sexual needs.

Emotional self care – Involves enhancing your own emotional literacy, navigating those emotions, increasing empathy, and developing compassion for self and others.

Spiritual self care – Involves the beliefs and values that are important to you and guide your life.

Environmental self care  – Involves nature and your surroundings: having an organized, well maintained and clutter free work, business and home environment, and mode of transport.

Intellectual self care – Involves feeding your mind, applying consequential thinking, and engaging intrinsic motivation.

Professional self care – Involves sharing your strengths, gifts, and your purpose in your professional role.

Financial self care – Involves taking accountability, being responsible with your finances (expenses, income, insurance, savings etc) and having a conscious relationship with money.

Social self care – Involves having a supportive group and network of relationships with people whom you trust and turn to when in need. To have caring and supportive people around you build a sense of belonging and connectedness.

Creative self care – Involves expressing your creativity in any form that allows you to create something new without holding onto the expectation of an end outcome.

This gave a more in-depth view at what self-care looks like for that particular part of myself. Truth be told there are some areas that are more sexy and easier to do than others, all equally important.

How Do You Practice Self Care?

This is where it can become even more cloudy, add to the stress and add to the anxiety of your life if you let it. Depending on what life stage you are currently at, self-care is going to look different.

If you are 22 with no kids, spending an extra hour every morning on your self-care practices will be easier to do

Whereas if you are 31 with 3 under 5, that most definitely will not be the same case for you.

  1. Know where you are at – awareness is key, without knowing where you are at, you will have a hard time determining what you need to do to get you where you want to go.
  2. Determine where you want to go – Set a goal of what you want each category to look like and set a date of when you what to achieve by
  3. Commit – Once you know where you want to go, make a commitment to yourself that you won’t give up. It’s not always going to be easy, what is important is that you do it, even in the times its not easy.
  4. Schedule it – Make it a part of your daily routine and add it into your calendar so you can work around it.
  5. Be flexible – It’s ok if something doesn’t work for you, keep trying new ideas until you find what sticks. You may also find that one thing you have been doing for a while may not work any more and you need to mix it up.
Self Care Rituals

Self Care Ideas

Part of your self care routine should be to take care of your mind, body and soul – however that may be.  Sometimes it’s a good idea to just get away from your everyday life and do something different for a while.  The same-old same-old every day can leave you with something akin to “emotional RSI”.  Even if you’re not feeling particularly stressed, try to get away for a weekend every now and then. It can help you disconnect, relax, and feel rejuvenated. You don’t have to spend a lot of money doing it, either.  Just go to a nearby town you haven’t visited before, see the sights and treat yourself lunch in a restaurant, if you can afford it. Otherwise plan yourself a picnic.

The idea is to move away from your normal schedule and take the time to do something just for yourself.

A pet can also help you live a better life; from giving unconditional love to providing companionship, pets can be hugely beneficial for our self care. Dogs can help reduce stress and feelings of anxiety – they love you unconditionally, and they’re always happy to see you. Taking your dog for a walk is also great way to get some exercise. Having a pet like a dog or a cat and can even lower blood pressure.

 

Physical Self Care

  1. Exercise
  2. Eat healthier foods
  3. Skin care routine
  4. Get nails and hair done
  5. Spa day
  6. Massage
  7. Better sleep
  8. Sex
  9. Stretching
  10. Taking vitamins

Emotional Self Care

  1. Healing trauma
  2. Speaking to a professional
  3. Learning your triggers
  4. Using more positive language
  5. Asking better questions
  6. Taking deep breaths
  7. Affirmations/mantras
  8. Journaling
  9. Tracking emotions you feel on a daily basis
  10. Practice gratitude

Spiritual Self Care

  1. Practice what you believe in
  2. Determine values
  3. Meditation
  4. Mindfulness
  5. Volunteering
  6. Nurture your soul
  7. Write personal mission statement
  8. Reflection
  9. Improve intuition
  10. Day Dream

Environmental Self Care

  1. Gardening
  2. Hiking
  3. Grounding
  4. Decluttering
  5. Cleaning
  6. Organizing
  7. Throwing away/donating items that are not needed
  8. Redecorating
  9. Go outside in the sun
  10. Star gazing

Intellectual Self Care

  1. Learn a new skill
  2. Read a book
  3. Advance current skills
  4. Go back to school
  5. Research something you are interested in
  6. Play Sudoku or do a crossword
  7. Put together a puzzle
  8. Solve a mystery
  9. Lose yourself in a movie
  10. Do nothing

Professional Self Care

  1. Ask for a raise
  2. Ask for a promotion
  3. Ask for a review
  4. Be clear on what is expected of you in your role
  5. Email etiquette
  6. Break room etiquette
  7. Not engaging in water cooler talk
  8. Boundaries
  9. Ask for that big project
  10. Pitch that big client

Financial Self Care

  1. Budgeting
  2. Investing
  3. Saving for a rainy day, house, vacation
  4. Donating
  5. Paying down/eliminating debt
  6. Finding more streams of income
  7. Asking for help
  8. Buying only what you need
  9. Cancelling subscriptions
  10. Negotiate lower rates on the bills you are paying

Creative Self Care

  1. ainting
  2. Create something new
  3. Arts and crafts
  4. Sewing
  5. Crocheting or knitting
  6. Make a vision board
  7. Drawing
  8. Clay modeling
  9. Pottery
  10. DIY furniture

Social Self Care

  1. Make plans with friends
  2. Plan staycation with family
  3. Have a girls night
  4. Call a friend or family member
  5. Involve friends and family in some of your other self-care practices
  6. Have clear boundaries
  7. Join a new group to meet new people
  8. Go on a date night
  9. Family game night
  10. Give a genuine compliment

 

Stop existing and start living! Life is a precious gift. Why waste it when you can have a more meaningful existence? Sure, you’ve got a lot of responsibilities, but your biggest responsibility is to yourself and being the best person you can be.

Lindsey Bobbitt Happiness Through Self-Care

Heeeyy!! I'm Lindsey!

I am the creator of the Happiness through Self-Care Project! A space dedicated to helping women become the best, happiest, and most alive version of themselves! Check out the blog with all the things related to self-care. Or If you are looking for more support with your self-care, try my free 30-day challenge to help you find time for yourself without feeling guilty about it.

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